TV Squad

• Ten great shows that were canceled in their first seasons
  

  Filed under: Other Drama Shows, Other Comedy Shows, OpEd, The Five, Cancellations, TV Squad Lists

  Welcome to TV Squad Lists (formerly 'The Five'), a feature where each blogger has a chance to list his or her own rundown of things in television that stand out from the rest, both good and bad.

  No matter how much TV I watch, I can't seem to get over the first rule of television programming; if it doesn't get the numbers, it doesn't get renewed. I have watched many a beloved show get yanked from the schedule due to low ratings, even though critics and fans...
  




• The ten worst movies based on TV shows
  

  Filed under: Other Drama Shows, Other Comedy Shows, Other Sci-Fi/Supernatural Shows, The Five, TV Squad Lists

  Welcome to TV Squad Lists (formerly 'The Five'), a feature where each blogger has a chance to list his or her own rundown of things in television that stand out from the rest, both good and bad.
  

  A couple of other bloggers have made lists concerning movies that have been made into TV shows and vice versa. There's The Top 10 Movies Based on TV Shows, The Top 5 Shows That are Better than the...
  




• The five greatest TV police detectives
  

  Filed under: OpEd, The Five, TV Squad Lists

  Welcome to TV Squad Lists (formerly 'The Five'), a feature where each blogger has a chance to list his or her own rundown of things in television that stand out from the rest, both good and bad.

  Ah, the police detective genre. It's one of the staples of a network's TV lineup. We all have our favorites, whether the characters are in blue uniforms or suits. Here are my Top 5 (and just so we're clear, I'm talking about police detectives, not private eyes or amateur investigators. I'll have that list tomorrow!)

  1. Lt. Columbo (Peter Falk): No contest, really....
  




• The Simpsons: Homerazzi
  

  Filed under: Other Comedy Shows, FOX, The Simpsons, Animation, The Five, Celebrities

  (S18E16) I often counter anti-Simpsons bromides by telling people that no series can be perfect all the time, but I think there's a part of me that still expects perfection. I'm like a mother that knows her child isn't perfect, and yet feels let down when they falter, because damn it, I know they're better than that.

  I probably could have come up with a better analogy, but it's too late now, I'm already on the second paragraph. The thing is: I liked this episode. It made me laugh, and it had...
  




• The Five: Best comic book-to-TV adaptations
  

  Filed under: OpEd, The Five, Watercooler Talk

  Being a comic book fan sets you up for a lot of disappointment. For one thing, there seems to be a pretty direct ratio between the number of Atlantis Attacks crossover books you own and the age at which you lose your virginity (ahem19ahem). For another, our only portrayal in the media seems to be Comic Book Guy on The Simpsons and he is as insulting as he is completely and utterly dead-on.
  
  The worst disappointment, though, is whenever some studio exec decides to "adapt" one of our mylar-enshrined treasures into some big or small screen...
  



• The Five: Your Project Runway Audition Guide
  

  Filed under: Other Reality Shows, NBC, The Five, Project Runway

  Project Runway is gearing up for a four city casting tour beginning March 30th in Los Angeles and continuing to Chicago, Miami and New York City. If you want to make the season four cut, you'll need to bring three garments of your own design, a picture portfolio and your completed application - soon to be available via BravoTV.com. And, don't worry, Tim Gunn will be back despite his many extracurricular activities.
  
  In the interest of helping further your design career, I've put together a brief primer for success on...
  



• The Five: Lies TV expects us to believe
  

  Filed under: OpEd, The Five, Watercooler Talk

  I get it: TV is supposed to lie to me. I know that the real reason Jared lost all that weight was because Subway sandwiches so destroyed his intestinal tract that he wasn't able to eat like he used to. I know that no guy in the history of America has ordered a Smirnoff Ice at a bar without hating himself a little. I know that despite repeated attempts to prove otherwise, the NHL no longer exists and Vs. isn't even a real TV channel.



• The Five: Ways to make Are You Smarter Than A 5th Grader? watchable
  

  Filed under: FOX, OpEd, The Five, Game Show

  I missed the premiere of Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader? Tuesday night as I had better things to do, like brush my dog's teeth. But curiosity got the best of me Wednesday night and I figured I'd check this show out. Whoa. What a big pile of poo.
  
  I don't think I need to go over everything that's wrong with this show, but as I'm watching it I started to come up with ideas that could make this one kick ass game show and make it feel a lot more...
  



• The Five: New commercials I can't stand
  

  Filed under: OpEd, The Five, Commercials

  It's really great to watch TV all day and night for a living. But then again, it's not that great to watch TV all day and night, because there's a lot of crap you have to put up with to get to the good stuff. Take commercials. Now, I actually like commercials, the good ones, but there are so many bad ones that...ugh. Here are five new-ish ones that have been driving me batty.

  1. That Honda commercial with Danica Patrick: She's on her way to meet someone and is running late, so she drives fast and is pulled over by a state...
  




• The Five: Best Lost guest stars
  

  Filed under: Other Drama Shows, ABC, OpEd, Lost, The Five

  Fionnula Flanagan's scene-stealing guest spot on the "Flashes Before Your Eyes" episode of Lost got me thinking about some of the other memorable guest stars the show has had over the years. It was difficult to commit to only five performances, with so many to choose from. Below are my picks for the most entertaining guest roles over the last three seasons.

  1. Clancy Brown ("One of Them"; "Live Together, Die Alone"): This actor owns every role he plays, from Brother Justin in Carnivale to Byron Hadley in The...